Well this is new for me. Call me Jay. If you know who I really am, I'd prefer if you kept that between us.
I've always been trapped in my own head, since I was a kid; Swimming in thoughts and processes, problems and solutions, opinions and facts has been an acquired and unintentional gift/curse of mine since I can remember. I have a good friend who blogs and it seems as if it helps them release their thoughts. I like the idea.
In the interest of keeping some level of anonymity, there are some things you will never know about me. However, now that I am thinking about it, it may come down to really just my name, address, and phone number you won't know. That's an interesting thought.
I'm 23 and live in Madison, Wisconsin, and I have a very interesting mixed personality. On one hand, I have a huge passion for being active. I've always been involved in a LOT of sports - and not just for the heck of it. Competitive level of ultimate frisbee, volleyball, baseball, soccer, track, cross country, weight lifting, snowboarding, skim boarding rock climbing...There's a list. But, on another hand, I do contend well with the nerd world. Playing and collecting Magic: The Gathering is a huge hobby of mine. I still play video games from my childhood like super smash bros, mario kart, pokemon - but also more modern ones. To give you an idea, looking over my screen into my entertainment center, I see a nintendo 64, a gamecube, PS2, xbox, gameboy advance, nintendo DS, and a pretty messy pile of cables. Another big hobby of mine is DJing. I make and mix house, trance, dubstep music. Which is going rather well, after learning piano, violin, guitar, mandolin, drums, and having almost my entire life been a part of some sort of group, orchestra, band, or what have you, exposing myself to a plethora of styles and articulations of music. Fun stuff.
But I'm not using this to brag about myself or try to get some sort of cliquey "fan base". Just telling you about me. Something very important about me is that I'm a very relational person. I thrive off of the energy of being around people when I can - I love being at parties, it's a lot of the reason I love being a DJ, I like entertaining / hosting grill-outs and dinners and such. There is also a not-so-great, much more difficult side to that end of my personality, though. I have a tremendous fear of being alone. I don't like it at all. Sometimes that fear is a short-term "I really don't want to be spending my Friday night by myself" kind of thing. Other times it's much broader - along the lines of not finding (and KEEPING) love, friendships, that kind of thing. Hopefully that doesn't sound as lame to you as it does to me right now. Trust me, there will be more on it in future posts. To be completely honest, that's a HUGE part of the reason I decided on starting to blog. It makes me at least think I'm maintaining some connection with people, and outside of my own little world on top of that.
I look forward to putting myself out there a bit. Like I said, I swim in thoughts and processes that I'm just itching to put on a platform other than my own head. Thanks in advance for reading :)
